Blogging · Personal

My 2019 so far

2019 is about to come to the end. Throughout this almost one year, 2019 has taught me more about humanity & empathy.

The first 3 months, I lost 4 people who were dearly to me. And then mom fell sick for months, in & out hospital; had to be there all the time. I skipped work plenty times but i don’t owe anyone an explanation for it.

Mid year was okay, alhamdulillah. But mom fell sick again. For 2 months I stayed morning & night to make sure both mom & dad had their needs done.

Mom could finally walk again. A week after her last therapy, I fell sick & couldn’t move around. I cried so hard in the ambo thinking, why me? It took me at least 1 month for me to get back on my feet again, had to rely on painkillers (hate it). I mean I can still walk but the recovery process (swollen bones and chest pain, overall) took at least one month.

Not to mention I had my very first big argument w/ my partner. But that big argument taught us to be more sabr & stronger.

I am still running on endless prairie, chasing my dream. This year, I seized every opportunity i was given; from Chinese series to English web series. I’m proud of my own outcome. It might be small but like i said, still running on endless prairie.

I told my dad my body can no longer take the air I’m breathing, working at night. Yes, I was a dumb young girl a decade ago. I didn’t think of my own future. I threw the opportunity I was given to continue study in the education industry; but if I didn’t make that choice, I wouldn’t be where I am now. I wouldn’t be able to play kites with the things I love.

The highlight in 2019, I finally got to operate a live show that is happening soon in Feb 2020. Not that much, but as a stagehand. I’m proud of myself.

It took me years to convince my parents about doing things I love. One day I surprised my mom to watch a movie with me. She was clueless & after she saw me on that big screen, she hugged me. She told my dad about it that night.

Yes, I regret for not seizing the opportunity to continue study 9 years ago but I don’t feel regret with the journey I went through. Here’s to more great opportunities coming soon in 2020! 2 dramas will be aired in January and i can’t wait for that too!

Oh also… I spend most of my time giving back to the society now. Chasing jannah too.

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